DISC Personality Profiling and Family
DISC .No matter how closely knitted a family can be, everyone within the family is different. There would not be two members who are exactly the same. Sometimes we tend to be closer to one family member than the other. There are situations where family members don’t talk to each other in a very long time. There are many reasons for such unfortunate situations, but there are also solutions that we can adapt to work together by understanding each other’s personality and knowing how exactly they can be communicated with.
DISC Personality Profiling
DISC profile forms one of the many different types of profiling tools that be used to understand human behaviour better. DISC profile is a very simple straightforward profiling tool that looks at the surface level of any normal human being. Due to the fact that it only shows the tip of the iceberg, it becomes a great communication tool. By understanding how we can communicate with one another, the likelihood of issues arising in a family becomes much lesser.
DISC profiles are mainly divided into four parts.
D – Dominant, Decisive, Decision makers
I – Inspirational, Interesting, Informational
S – Safe, Secure, Sensitive
C – Conscious, Contemplating, Calculators
Everyone would have all four of these traits. The difference will be that we spend lesser energy in showcasing some of these traits compared to others.
Some of us can have up to three traits at the same time, as they complement each other.
Greatest Fear for the traits
D – D’s greatest fear will be to be taken advantage off, as they always want to give more. D’s also have a fear of losing power therefore they always will be seen holding fort and never letting go.
I – I’s love people and always want to be out with people to be the “people-pleasers”. This makes their greatest fear to be rejection. They would always want to be part of an initiative and would be devastated if they were not included in any planning or initiatives.
S – S’s need security and always seek for support. Their greatest fear is lost of security and would not be comfortable if they are in a situation that does not guarantee their mental, emotional, physical, social safety
C – C’s are very precise with their work and almost always thrive to deliver the best. This makes their greatest fear to be criticism. C’s can’t take criticism well as they always position they work to be at its best.
By now while reading this, we might have had an understanding of where exactly we might fall in. Let’s explore a couple of scenarios and how the various traits will respond to the situation.
DISC traits and Response to Situation
Scenario 1: Husband and Wife planning on a location to have dinner
Wife: Let’s go for dinner.
Wife: Where shall we go?
Wife: I’m always choosing, please choose a location.
Husband: Okay sure, let’s go below and eat prata. No travel time, and cheap.
Wife: …….. I was thinking of like buffet at a hotel……..
Husband: Okay sure. Anything.
Wife: You never cared! Don’t need dinner!
Sounds familiar? If you see closer, they both have different expectations of what a dinner should hold. The Wife could be a very high I person who loves to go out, take pictures of the food and post on Instagram on their great evening. Where else the husband can be a high D person who’s very objective and just wants to eat dinner in the most fastest and efficient way.
Scenario 2: Father and Son buying a new sofa for the living room
Son: Alright dad, let’s buy a new sofa for the living room.
Father: Why do we need a new one?
Son: Because I have my friends coming over and our sofa looks really bad now. They will talk about me and start talking behind my back.
Father: Don’t think it is necessary. How will the new one help you friends to not talk behind your back? What is the probability of them not doing it? A new sofa will cost $1,000. How can you measure the return of investment for the sofa? What will be your actions taken in order to pay back for the investment?
Son: I think we will go for dinner at MacDonald’s instead, thank you.
The Son being a High I person does not want to be rejected, therefore would do anything to be part of a clique. The father being a High C person needs details and will be very structured in details in order to understand the situation. Problem is, usually when a High C person were to ask for information, many times people tend to give up or just decide to not pursue.
Solutions using DISC
As the diagram shows, the opposite traits are the ones usually will have some tension.
D vs S à D’s are generally very demanding and tend to overpower at times. S being the quieter ones tend to feel too oppressed with Ds and might not want to share their opinions or feelings since the Ds might flip out at them. Ds generally are just very objective with their approach and do not really worry about feelings where else S feelings does affect their decision making, therefore making them two poles.
I vs C à Is tend to always see the big picture and in doing so might miss out the finer details. Cs always need to work with details as they tend to give a perfect work all the time. This creates tension as Is might not be able to see the details that Cs are expecting them to have seen. Cs also tend to be objective and task orientated therefore missing out the feelings portion and Is are very people centred, therefore some of their decisions might be affected during such arguments.
The challenge will be that one trait has something the other trait does not have (Eg. Having the bigger picture vs looking at details)
D and S working together à Ds are very demanding and do not look at feelings since they tend to be objective, this is when an S will be able to help to make certain communications.
Eg. Father is D and Mother is S à The father might not be happy with the son’s performance in a particular area, rather than directly confronting him he can work with the mother to speak to the son and explain the situation and allow the son to open up. This will allow the son to see where the parents are coming from and for the parents to understand the situation that the son is in.
I and C working together à Is tend to be an influencer and Cs are more detail orientated. If there is a decision that needs to be made, if it comes from an I the chances of buying into the idea is alot higher. Therefore if the father is a high I and the mom high C, the mom could share with the dad when are the possibilities of choosing certain vacation location and come up with a decision together. Later the father can share this with the rest of the family members so that everyone would be happy with the plan.
There are many ups and downs in a family but the main problems that family faces everyday will be communication. If everyone knew how to communicate with each other and communicate the way the other party wants to listen to, many of the problems will be solved. Understanding our style and our family members style allows us the opportunity to explore new grounds together and build a stronger bond.
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